never apologize

my bff fo realz texted me tonight these words: “Sorry that you have a shit show for a best friend.” Frankly I’m amazed she spelled so accurately. However, whenever you think you’re doing something that qualifies yourself as a “shit show”  or even a “hot mess,” you need to first consider what your best friend [...]

Taco Bell items that are yum

I love Taco Bell. This isn’t news. It started in high school (as did most obsessions in my little life) when I worked at the now-defunct Olive Garden off Manchester in West County. Every night shift I would get off work late with a gremlin yelling in my stomach demanding sustenance. I make a habit [...]

Food. A Love Story.

I have very terrible diet. About 90% of the food and beverage I put into my body is considered “bad” “unhealthy” “fattening” “carb-loaded” or “diet suicide” by the health experts. And by health experts, I mean weight-watchers, diet-pill infomercials, and every woman’s magazine on the planet. I know how to eat “healthy,” I just choose [...]

Baking Frenzy and the USPS

It’s funny Bing just posted in praise of Liz Insler’s baking because I was working on a baking post myself. It was the car wreck entry that prompted me, actually, because I was on my way to deliver birthday cupcakes when I totaled the Cuntfire a block from my house. I have been on a [...]

Who doesn’t love baked goods?

My best friend from college, Miss Elizabeth Insler, has requested that I help promote her bake sale. This isn’t an ordinary bake sale, however, but a bake sale in order to raise funds for an auction this Friday. What’s (who’s) being auctioned? Her sexy, dreamy, mystical Civil Procedure Professor! So help make one law student’s [...]

OMG FRIED CHICKEN

Alright, Butterflies, I admit it: I have a very complex relationship with meat. My vegetarianism (when it has existed) has existed on a very precarious plane. It is most often a change I make because of someone else that I don’t stick to because of someone else. And I am ready to admit publicly that [...]

A Socialite Does South Beach

Hello my new friends! Welcome to the ramblings about my adventures in South Beach Dieting. Full disclosure: I started the diet three weeks ago, made it through Phase 1 and went home for spring break, and fell off the diet wagon. I didn’t mean to give up, and I still made good choices but I [...]